Well, it has been an eventful couple of days since my last blog. As a freshly minted blogger (or blogee I presume if one is the subject of a blog) I am rather bemused to know that the current functioning of my stomach and bowels is common knowledge to all readers of the break your limits home page. For this I must thank Mr Raymond, always a friend you can count on.
I can confirm that after suffering some external plumbing issues at the much esteemed Bayu Hotel I have recently been experiencing my own internal plumbing issues. For this reason I have done little but sleep for the past 36 hours and for this reason it is now that at midnight here in Malaysia I am wide awake and writing this blog.
During my ordeal I have been well cared for by Nurse Claire and Doctor Raymond. Together, the two make a powerful medical force that make Dr House look like nothing more than a well-versed first year undergrad student. The only problem being that with their widely divergent backgrounds they struggle to agree on anything at all.
Nurse Claire’s qualifications include a Bachelor of Nursing at ECU, a university at the forefront of nursing education in Australia with extensive practical skills including on site work in hospitals in Australia and Thailand. In addition she has veterinary skills and experience and extensive experience in caring for the elderly and unwell.
Dr Raymond has absolutely no formal qualifications whatsoever but claims to have been educated at ‘the school of hard knocks’. His credentials include, parents living and working in Cambodia, 8 tours of Malaysia, 2 tours of Thailand and at least 1 tour of Cambodia itself.
The team worked together at my bedside in a fashion not dissimilar to that outlined below (note if actual events differ in any way from my version of events (as may be claimed by Nurse Claire or Dr Raymond), it is only that at the time my head was rather foggy due to my illness):
NC: Bill, make sure you drink lots of Gatorade.
DR: No, Gatorade has sugars in it. Sugars are no good for his intestinal tract.
NC: Yes, but he needs the electrolytes.
DR: What he needs is some dry bread, that will block him up a bit.
NC: No the bread will go straight through, he cannot absorb it.
DR: Hmmmm, what about some Gatorade then.
NC: No, it has sugars in it.
And on it went. …
NC: He has not got Dengue fever because he has no rash plus I have pinched him really hard and nothing happened (note here that I am not sure what should have happened once being pinched really hard but trust that there was some method to Claire’s ways).
DR: Yes but he could develop a rash soon enough.
NC: Ray! I am nurse, listen to me will you!!
Me: I have just got bali belly, c’mon guys, it’s not that bad. This is what happens in Asia.
DR: Not necessarily, you may have something else. Are you hot?
Me: Yes of course I am hot, I am lying on a bed in Malaysia! (For the record, I don’t think anybody has been genuinely cold in Malaysia since the breaking of the last Ice Age about 2.5 million years ago).
NC: Your heart rate is high, maybe you have typhoid, or have you thought about Malaria?
Me: Typhoid, Malaria! No, please let me rest, I have just got bali belly , I promise you I will be fine once it passes!
After a while, Nurse Claire threatened that she would take me to hospital if I did not improve in a hurry (this was no shallow threat either – after sneaking a peak in Claire’s notebook, I have found that she had jotted down the address and directions to Hospital Putrajaya). Being a great fearer of hospitals even in Perth, let alone those in foreign countries, I quickly tried to act like I was on the mend. I contemplated jumping out of bed and donning the running shoes just to prove I was fine, but alas I could not find the energy. So instead I lay down in fear of tropical diseases the type of which I have not heard of since reading about the voyages of Captain Cook and tried to rest.
Anyhow, as time has passed I have slowly come to feel better. And in truth I must thank Claire and Raymond for the care and interest in my well-being. Tonight Claire cooked us a hearty pumpkin soup just like my favourite at home. The soup was thoroughly enjoyed as Claire’s soups always are and no doubt it will set me on the path to a rapid recovery.
I now must pull out all stops to regain my strength before the Desaru International Long Course Triathlon on Saturday. Two days of illness and severe dehydration are not ideal with 5 days between races but if nothing else, at least I will be racing light
No doubt, you will hear all is it happens so stay tuned.
Before I go, I would like to thank Raymond for letting me air my views on the BYL website as I forgot to do this last time in the excitement that was my first ever blog.
And I also must thank everyone that has commented on our blogs to date, particularly all the local athletes from the Baling Duathlon. It was great to meet you and race with you and I hope that we can stay in touch. Happy training.